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How Do I Motivate My Child To Study?

The nagging starts, the arguments, the warnings, the worry. Your child just doesn’t want to study!! What do I do?? Help!

As children get older, they have more responsibility and pressure with school. Some students have the motivation, and others don’t. This is why we need to figure out WHY and HOW you can motivate your child to study!

So how do we take action positively and effectively? This is why Breaking The Chalk has academic consulting to find the student’s needs and then correctly guide and empower.

So what can you do when your child has no motivation to study?

Let’s first understand WHY your child isn’t motivated to study or do well in school.

We are asking these questions to understand and learn about your child or teen, connect and support. We need to hear them, take what they say seriously, affirm, and work together to motivate them and do better at school and personally.

Why is this the first step? My belief is that when we know precisely what our child needs, we can then better guide them proactively. If we don’t see the core struggle with school, we cannot effectively help and understand why they are unmotivated to study. It is literally the key!

These are a few WHY examples:

  • They are overwhelmed with their studying and homework

  • They do not actually understand the work

  • They are bored

  • They have remedial or special educational needs

  • They aren’t getting the correct studying help

  • They do not know how to study or how to do their homework

  • Their school work is too easy or too hard

  • There is too much pressure

  • Studying that isn’t suited to their learning style

  • Struggling with anxiety about school

  • Low self-confidence and self-belief

  • Struggling with their mental health

So? What do we do now to motivate the child?

As someone who has worked with hundreds of students that have these struggles, I know what to do! So, here we goooo!

Now that we understand WHY our child is unmotivated to study - we will know exactly HOW to approach it! We need to listen to what they need.

4 tips for how to motivate your child to study and to do well at school!

  1. Explore WITH your child (it’s about the WITH - teamwork) how they would prefer to learn.

So, what questions do we ask?

  • Would you want to study straight after school or later in the day?

  • Do you want me to sit with you as support?

  • How much time would be practical to study for?

  • When should we add breaks? In between subjects? How long? Where?

  • Would you prefer to study by writing (summarising), recording/listening, bouncing on a pilates ball, walking up and down, or reading? Let’s explore!

  • Do you want to sit and make a timetable? (For a personalised one - contact us ;)

  • What do we do first? - Homework? Assignments? Projects? (think adequate to their needs)

  • What support do you need? From me? From your teacher/school? From a professional? (Can be specific ones for remedial and special educational needs)

But, why is it important to give my child the control if they are the ones who are unmotivated to study, to study independently, or make an effort?

Because they are the students and know what they need! Imagine someone telling you what you need? (how annoying). We want to motivate our children to study and have school success with positivity and communication. Believe me, it’s the most beneficial.

Do you want your child to study independently? You need to give THEM the trust and support to decide, and THEY will then be motivated because THEY are in oversee.

Okay, so now what?

2. Let’s plan WITH them a safe and comforting study area. What does this mean?

  • Having their favourite toys, posters, pens, books, stickers (go for a bit of shop - makes it exciting), chairs, etc.

  • Choose together an area that will work best (outside, playroom, lounge, room, wherever)! Doesn’t even have to be a desk - informality is fun.

  • Include their favourite colours, decorations, etc

  • Maybe tea comforts them? Add that to their safe space.

Why do we do this? It is our nature to want to succeed, so obviously, something is wrong! So, this is a chance to provide comfort, safety, and rapport with a studying area that provides that. They will look forward to having their unique space. This is what will motivate your child to study and study independently with school success. It is all about meeting their needs!

Need more personalised tips? Book a one on one consultation or a personalised parent workshop with a free practical e-book.

https://www.breakingthechalk.com/contact

https://www.breakingthechalk.com/breakingthechalk-familyconsulting

3. Limit Stress and Pressure

Your child is already overwhelmed; we want to encourage our children to study and empower! As a teenager who struggled at school because of pressure and stress, I suffered from anxiety, burnout, and depression. Whilst I was a motivated student, my studying techniques were too much (study till 2 am and wake up at 5:30 to revise - I know!!). This led to me leaving high school and studying on my own in a setting that supported me rather than affected me.

I’m sharing this and my work experience with children and teenagers because I KNOW what it’s like to struggle at school. This is why this blog specialises in meeting the child and teenager’s needs to motivate them to study and do well at school, healthily.

So how do I reduce their stress and pressure?

  • Spend time with them to listen and connect (go to BreakingTheChalk Instagram to know how to talk about mental health)

  • Make sure in the timetable to include self-care and pure relaxing time. Also, have this during study breaks.

  • Have check-ins - “How did studying go to today” “What is stressing you” “Do you need help with anything” “How can I support you”? (go to BreakingTheChalk Instagram to save our post for exactly this)

  • Have de-stress activities - going for a walk, music, tv, colouring, play, baking/cooking, games, outdoors, family time, etc

  • Ask them what is stressing and pressurising them - knowing what makes them stressed; helps navigate how to reduce it.

  • Talk, talk, talk. Connecting allows encouragement, study motivation, and feeling supported.

4. Focus on the journey, rather than the marks

But marks equal success and progress? Mmm, not always. Throughout the journey, there are learning steps, progress, and goals met. When we only concentrate on the mark, we add more pressure, anxiety, low self-esteem, overwhelm, and motivation drops, and the school struggle begins.

Giving punishment and saying remarks about their results counter-acts giving the child motivation. We want them to enjoy learning, allowing independence and perseverance. This is also a life skill - gaining confidence to push through, finding the skills to reach a goal, and having autonomy. Hence, teamwork with your child to do better at school, focusing on their process and success to motivate them.

Comment and affirm their progress instead of the marks. For example, “I saw the maths was hard today, and look how well you got through it. Are you feeling proud”? “How did you manage that”?

This is a growth mindset - a helpful concept to changing your mindset to growth. Go to Breakingthechalk Instagram to know how to do it.

Since your child is unmotivated with their studies and might not be doing well at school, be enthusiastic and encouraging, find ways that make their learning and the journey enjoyable.

Each child and teen is an individual, so you need to personalise these tips to who and how they are. It can be a rollercoaster and a journey, but it always works. Hey, you asked how to motivate your child - this is it!

Need more personalised tips? Book a one on one consultation or a personalised parent workshop with a free practical e-book.

https://www.breakingthechalk.com/contact

https://www.breakingthechalk.com/breakingthechalk-familyconsulting

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